…open or resistant…

“Commitment is the enemy of resistance, for it is the serious promise to press on, to get up, no matter how many times you are knocked down.” — David McNally

In the realm of life lessons, we all have experiences where something was asked of us and we find ourselves either open or resistant to doing it.  Sometimes we run headlong, eager to take up the challenge.  Other times we dig in our heals and resist for no particular reason.  

Our stance of openness or resistance depends on our ability to share ourselves.   There is a spectrum of feeling around identity and vulnerability. The more identified and vulnerable we are then the more closed and resistant we become.  Working out a resistance means looking at the ‘edges’ that come up.  How safe are we moving in a particular direction?

An edge is a boundary between something that we are comfortable with and something that pushes us toward worry or panic.  Edges are tricky places.  There is a subtle, but definite, resistance around moving in a direction that is challenging or unknown.  Sometime you can watch it happen.  Sometimes you can teach yourself to ask questions about the ‘edges’ you encounter:

  • “Why am I being open or resistant here?”
  • “If I am resistant, what does that get me?”
  • “What might allow me to be more open right now?”
  • “If I am being open, how does that help me?  What makes this seem so easy?”
 We don’t have to second-guess ourselves.  And the way we work with our edges says a lot about personal mastery.  It is generally better to challenge ourselves than to accept complacency, provided of course we are not being arbitrarily committed to any one particular course of action.  Committment maybe the enemy of resistance, but we are all human.
If you feel uncomfortable, you might ask: “On a scale of 1-10, where am I right now with regard to this problem?”  Your answer often helps uncover something outside of your normal thinking.
There is a famous image called an Uroborus.  It is a snake devouring its own tail.  This image is contradictory.  It is often associated with both health and fear.  And it is often unclear to us which side we are on when we are being either open or resistant.  So don’t assume anything.
Follow your intuition and invite others to help you loosen up, if that seems like the right thing to do.  Firm and clear answers are generally the exception – not the rule.
To see the Uroborus image, click here.

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